EXCITING NEWS! I have a hot Valentines date coming up: a full-on three course meal of fists and elbows to the face with a local Thai girl I’m very lucky to get. As an opponent, of course.
Instead of having fine dining with my countless lovers (lol you know me), I’ll be eating punches to my face. And to be honest with you, I am genuinely looking forward to it.
On my last night at home over the Christmas break, I went out to dinner with some Japanese family friends. I told them the super exciting news that I was having a fight in Thailand – then I realised, whether this was ‘exciting news’ was truly a matter of perspective. One of them, who had seen a photo of me injured pretty badly, could not for the life of her understand why I would want to get into the ring again. It seemed like suicide to her in more than one sense. “Quit before you get married – quit before you find a boyfriend!” She was genuinely concerned for me, and I appreciated that. I didn’t mean to be rude but I found it absolutely hilarious. If I need to quit what I love doing for a man, because they think it’s conventionally a manly sport and the bruises make less attractive, then, that person is not even worth my time. I am shamelessly going to admit I like getting battle scars because I think it makes me look kinda badass. I remember when I was eight, I got a Harry Potter scar across my temple from Karate. A head-kick connected to my temple and a long-toenail scraped it deeeeep: I thought I looked so damn cool! And added bonus: when I have them, they’ve always been great conversation starters and banter, curing awkward social situations I often find myself in.
Others may be accepting of it, but they still scrunch up their face and tell me to be careful or quit later on. Why do you do it Tomo? Why? Do a triathlon or something if you want a physical challenge!
Well, I’m not going to lie to you – sometimes I ask myself the same question in the ring as I take a killer punch to my temple or jaw. And I also ask the same question when a 2hr training session finishes with 100 kicks each side. And when I’m forbidden from carbs and sugar. And when I missed countless birthday parties and social events, I asked myself that question, too. But if I think in prospective hindsight, the answer becomes clear. I’ve never, ever regretted getting into the ring. In hindsight, I never regretted making those sacrifices to achieve something. Even the last fight I had which was an utter disaster (I left cutting weight too late and fainted at work, was carried to after hours and couldn’t train the week leading up to the fight) I didn’t regret: because under challenging circumstances, I still gave it my best.
I’ve given it a year off, and at one point I thought I would never step into the ring ever again – all I could think was “I don’t want to have to lose weight again, I don’t want to commit myself to such hard training schedules, and I don’t want to lose again.”
But f-that, I can’t leave it on that disastrous note! Everyone has their first loss at some point, unless you’re Floyd Mayweather but everyone hates him anyway. Every fighter has also undoubtedly had agonising weight cuts where rice, pasta and chocolate reappear in their nightmares every night (am I alone on this?) At some point my ego needed to brought down and I had to experience the shittiness that is losing. And at some point, I had to put myself up for the challenge again.
But why would anyone want to put themselves through so much physical pain to play a sport, that to be harsh and realistic, isn’t going to take you anywhere unless you pursue it as a professional career? It’s not making money, rather, it’s eating your money in form of gym fees and regular physio visits, and consumes your time, and prohibits you from your favourite things on earth – like alcohol and carbs. WHYY.
Well, challenging yourself and achieving things gives you a buzz like nothing else. I will never forget the rush of adrenaline I got when I stepped out of the ring after my first fight! My friends cheered on and had cronuts and beer ready for me ringside, and I couldn’t feel any pain in my legs because of the adrenaline, and I felt like I just ticked off a 100 page to-do list and that I could do anything if I set my mind to it.
So ok, challenging yourself is one thing, but fighting a girl with over 20 fights in full-thai rules in Thailand, the land of Muay Thai, when you’ve had 0 fights with full-Thai rules? Okay, yeah. I’ll admit that’s kind of suicide. It must be the samurai spirit that’s ingrained deep down in my soul, fearless in the face of defeat (lol I wish, I’m actually shit scared!!!) I’m aware I could be badly injured, and I’m very much aware of the probability that I could get knocked out cold. But would I sign myself up for it if it was a walk in the park? Nah.
And my goal this time is different to every other time I’ve fought. It’s not to win, but to have fun. I recall a few fights where I was so set on winning and everyone told me it would be ‘easy.’ The pressure became such a burden, and I had nightmares where I lost and disappointed my trainers. I didn’t have much fun in the ring because all I could feel was the fear of losing, and I wasn’t living in the moment. The anxiety stopped and the buzz only came after the being announced as the winner. So I’m really hoping this time I could just go in and give it my best.”Fuck pride” as Marsellus Wallus once wisely said to Butch, (I’ll just leave this clip here) even though Butch rips up in that fight. I just want to keep a cheeky grin on my face the whole time. By that I mean smiling while I get the shit kicked out of me with elbows, knees and fists, to the best of my abilities. If I get a cut, if I get knocked out or badly beaten, hey – at least I’d have a cool as instaphoto, right? Or maybe a new tinder profile pic, take that. Hold me to this one.
So just like that, my painful but rewarding journey begins. I’m fighting at 57kg – usually I fight around 54-55kg so the cut ‘theoretically’ shouldn’t be too hard, but I’m not as skinny as when I was fighting regularly so this unfortunately means saying goodbye to some of my favorite things like pork belly, beer, chocolate, ice cream, and most carbs. I’m tearing up just writing about this. Goodbye lovers. My training schedule will include running at least 60km a week, training six times a week for at least an hour and a half a day – including pad work, and a lot of clinching and sparring.
So wish me luck – and if you happen to be in Chiang Mai in February, plz come support. Chur xx
PS: Bangkok friends – hit me as hard as you can if you see a beer in my hand!
Lost in Gustation 
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